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About Shymkent

So sexual-massage, yeah? It’s like a massage, but spicy, innit. Them hands ain’t just kneadin’ ya back - they’re goin’ *places*, fam. Little-known fact - back in ancient times, them Chinese emperors was gettin’ these rubs to “balance their chi” or summat. Probs just an excuse to get freaky, haha! Makes me laff thinkin’ about some posh git in a robe tryna play it cool while he’s all oiled up.

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Then, I run into this guy I know, Dauren. He’s always got the craziest stories. Today, he’s telling me about this time he got lost in the mountains near Makinsk. I’m laughing so hard, I almost drop my bag. He’s like, “I thought I was gonna be a bear’s dinner!” Classic Dauren.

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